“As the thunder rolls I barely hear you whisper through the rain, I’m with you “. Casting Crowns.

At my son’s funeral I had this song played. It spoke volumes as to where my heart was and truthfully still remains. It feels like I was just writing about the 10 years and now it’s 11 in the next 2 weeks. Time can quiet the noise but never fully heal. Time heals all wounds most definitely is not the case for the loss of your child as any of us here in this ache will tell you. I dare not speak for those who have lost other loves…but your child is beyond brutal.

Attending a beautiful women’s retreat today was emotionally trying. Such a lovely speaker who shared so many truths of God’s love for us. Some hard triggers were hit and I felt the words of this song run through me. I can barely hear you whisper through MY rain, I’m with you. He is though whether I can hear or feel Him…He’s there always!

I learned the word, Ezer, today. One who runs quickly to help or aid another. A huge thank you, with all the gratitude in my soul, for all of you who have been an Ezer for me the last years. Whether here physically or with your heartfelt kind words of support and the prayers offered up…there are just not adequate words to express how much you have meant.

We talk about being kind to others and truly seeing them because our words or smile might be the only good they see today…but just the smallest of gestures may be so huge to that soul. Such sweet stories were shared around my table of women of how someone helped them and what an impact it made on them. Some stating the one helping truly had no idea the magnitude of how much it meant.

Send the text, make a call, hug someone, offer to open a door or pick up what was dropped, make eye contact, or just a smile from the heart. Gestures, no matter how small or seemingly insignificant, can impact in ways that are far beyond what you are doing or can possibly comprehend.

I’ve read stories from people who were on their way to end their lives and a gesture of kindness stopped the dark spiral. You simply have no idea what impact you can have in this hurting world.

Life’s journey is not just ours but all those we encounter on our way. Be someone’s saving light today…you never know!!🥰

Love and light your way as always ❤️🪷

It’s a rainy, gray Saturday and I am enjoying every moment of it. A warm cozy fire and a cup of hot tea from leaves a dear one provided.

As I stood by the glass doors overlooking the river I noticed the mallards out there on the water. Two docks have ducks lined up, either huddled together or nestled down in their feathers by themselves. A few of the ducks are swimming around in the water between the docks. There is one little guy floating alone yet another dock over. Perhaps he is pondering the day out there away from the others. Do waterfowls think or just follow instincts? There’s community out there on this rainy day. Even the one off to himself is not too far away from all the others.

There is peace, calm and serenity bubbling up quietly today. Community. We all need community even when we feel the need, whether by choice or by life changes, to be one dock over from all others. Sometimes to ponder our life.. our choices..our purpose.. but sometimes just a day like today to…just be.

Rain is coming down a bit harder and clouds are getting darker. At times the darkening clouds feel foreboding but today they just feel like a warm blanket to settle under. A song from church and my childhood just surfaced. When peace like a river attendeth my soul…when sorrows like sea billows roll. Whatever my lot thou hast taught me to say..it is well with my soul.

This rainy day and observing the ducks has reminded me…it is well with my soul❤️. Our journey of life brings those days when the sea billows are rolling so sit and breathe in these days when the gentle rains are falling and our river of life is gently flowing… make that cup of tea and if even for a few moments…just breathe and be. Above all make sure it is well with your soul 🪷🪷🪷 namaste 😊

This morning I was greeted with a beautiful mist over the river. Monet came to mind with one of his misty water paintings. Serene moment to just breathe in the calmness out there and in my heart. Ebb and flow surfaced as I observed the muted colors and heard the mallards flapping and swimming around. Calmness. Peaceful. In and out those emotions flow.

Our social media notifications that pop up can steal those emotions very quickly causing us stress and overwhelm with our world’s chaos. In my quiet time I was reminded of the verses that tell us to think on whatever is pure, just, truth, peaceful…Think on these things. Do the things we share bring life, hope and uplift one another or despair and fear. Today I will concentrate on being light and life, not tearing down or fear. Our thoughts are who we are. Guarding my heart is not always easy but something I choose to work on.

Our journey here definitely has ebb and flow. Choose to let your words bring life not despair. Remember the peaceful and serene moments that you have encountered when fear tries to creep in. Protect your precious heart when others, as well as yourself, try to bring you down with the gloom of the world. It’s so easy to slip down that black hole. You cannot stop a thought from surfacing but you can choose how you will react.

For those of you who are Bible readers I leave you with this verse:

Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Philippians 4:8.

As a man thinks..so is he❤️. To be intentional with our thoughts as they ebb and flow is a goal worth pursuing. 🪷🪷🪷

Officially, there are 3 days of summer left. This warm September morning the sun is so brilliant in a clear cloudless blue sky. Calm water with barely a ripple out on my river. My tiny hummingbirds are happily enjoying their sugar water. Someone down river has country music drifting up to me. A dog is barking up river with an occasional ship’s horn in the distance. Other than these remote sounds it is quiet this morning.

Yes, Autumn is fast approaching bringing chilly temperatures, crisp air and glorious colors in the trees. A time for pumpkins, spiced coffees and teas, campfires and s’mores, smiling kids in funny costumes awaiting treats, gratefulness in thanksgiving as we pause to give thanks for our multitudes of blessings. There is always a sadness in my summer heart as this season ends and the next begins. Heat is my biggest friend 🌞

My dear friend lost his brother in law last week. In a matter of 10 days cancer was discovered and he passed on. Just that quickly lives changed. A father, husband and relative was gone. Just as the seasons keep changing so too our lives. The older I get the faster the changes seem to be coming.

This journey of life passes so very quickly. Do take time to savor each and every day and season. Each season has its beauty. Change is guaranteed. As for me, today, I will enjoy this beautiful summer day.

Love and light to each of you ❤️🪷🪷🪷 Take a minute and breathe in joy today wherever you are in your personal season🌺🌻

I read in a card once, “Time and tide wait for no man”. Make the most of this season and don’t wait for things or others…live today🌞

A few years ago my daughter gave me an exquisitely beautiful, blown glass, hummingbird feeder. About to give up on seeing any of the precious little creatures this year, one tiny being has finally shown up. Oddly, just one. In previous years a handful would jockey for position and a chase would ensue. This little guy has my feeder all to himself .

Sitting as still as I possibly can I watch as he flutters around then alights to drink the sugar water. If I move much he wisks away. Yesterday morning as I sat with my coffee, feeling the warm sun on my face and basking in the glow of glittering sunshine across the water, he appeared.

Somehow in watching this beautiful little bird I was reminded of how we must appear to God. He lovingly provides for us and watches in pure love as we enjoy His gifts. Most of the time we are not even aware of all that we are gifted and that it is from our Creator. We flutter away in fear if we feel Him too close. It would never cross my mind to harm this vibrant little being. The God of all creation rejoices over us and would never harm us yet we are mistrusting. His gentle hand is always there…feeding us…singing over us in joy..and our water never runs dry. My glass container becomes empty at times like my bird feeder, fragile and needing to be refilled… in my quiet times He refills me with His unfailing love and mercy that is new every morning.

Take time today to alight and drink from the well that will never run dry! On this journey of life He is always with us❤️. Much love and light to you🌺🌞

There are mornings when I am so overwhelmed with creation’s majestic beauty I simply cannot form words!

Gratitude: The state of being grateful; warm and friendly feeling toward a benefactor; kindness awakened by a favor received; thankfulness. 

Yes, that feeling toward my creator, the ultimate benefactor. Such favor. I think this is the feeling of soul overflow. So incredibly grateful that I am lost in the myriad of emotions flooding through me.

Waves against the small sea wall from the passing boat further enhances that feeling. Cicadas singing along with the crickets hum and birds belting out their joy…a perfect morning. Unusually cool days for August have made sitting out here in the mornings quite enjoyable.

Fall is in the air and rapidly approaching. Crisp air, like this morning, will replace the languid sultriness of summer (which I love) but bringing with it the explosion of autumn’s palette. Every season has its own distinct beauty. Grateful for each of those season specific God sitings.

Being still and just breathing in creation in all its grandeur…take a minute on this holiday weekend to be still and just observe all that surrounds you . Have a safe and beautiful Labor Day weekend my friends! Much love and light to you🪷🪷🪷

Being the absolute staunchest believer in …there are no coincidences in life…just divine appointments…today’s note(actually as are all of them) comes from that place.

So much has whipped through my tornadic mind in the last 24 hours I’m not sure I can get it all out!!!

First I will start by saying the last 3 months of soul searching has paid off in the last day. Quite strange at this juncture in life things are finally coming together in my ever searching quest to find my place.

Two sleepless nights of, one crying and the next berating myself, led to peaceful rest today. A very dear, long distance, friend got hammered with my venting and maudlin rhetoric late yesterday. I’m sure he was sorry he started listening but was a good sport in it all. No judgement just an encouraging soul.

My Beach-Zen partner was out of town for 2 days and I felt completely alone in dismantling our show load from the previous evening. My frustration in, how dare you have a life when your muscles are needed right now. I’m trying to start accepting that when one tells me they will help soon as they can…it just might not coincide with my time table…relaxing is difficult for me to say the least…(an endless work in progress🫣). Hurting my arm a few months ago has slowed down my “forget it I’ll do it myself” attitude.

Back to my coincidences… when a quote or verse repeatedly shows up…I take notice with an, Ahhh, I see where God is going with this…

Fear is What if

Faith is Even if

Let that sink in… took me the 4th time of seeing it”pop up” to really hear its message.

Leaving a somewhat secure and mostly stable job 3 months ago was definitely a game changer (once again). My road less traveled churned up again. Desperately needing to be out of the high stress, performance based, daily grind of that atmosphere…I stepped back out in faith to, “go it on my own”, again. Having done that for 23 years prior it was not as scary as it might have been. This last week I was suddenly overtaken with “what if “, that was a mistake and there isn’t enough work…but God is such a better boss to work for. I knew I needed a respite to stop a few months and “Just be…. You know practice what I preach”.

In my rant last night I said my mind was “just mud”. I have never once referred to my monkey mind as “mud” before. The lotus came to mind in selecting an icon for Beach-Zen. They always come from mud..fighting their way out of that muck..,to rise up and bloom to such exquisite beauty!!! The online service I listened to this morning…you guessed it…fear is what if and faith is even if. The book I bought months ago from Brene Brown, Braving the Wilderness, just “happened to be” on the top of my pile of books.

Always, having felt like an outsider, I could relate to every word I was reading. She quotes from Maya Angelou, about not belonging anywhere or to anyone. I belong to myself.

So in this long diatribe …there it is…I belong to myself … nowhere and everywhere…

If you are searching for purpose or to belong …pick up her book. “Braving the Wilderness “. I know without a doubt at least one person out there needed to hear this today!

Always remember, “No mud, no lotus “, you are beautiful exactly in who you are!!! Sending love and light to you today 🪷🪷🪷

And yes, I will wait for the muscles to help with the last of the heaviest pieces for tomorrow 😊. My faith in the, “even if”, is in the one who created me and is with me in and through it all…keep your eyes focused on Him…or as Joel Osteen’s, book says…if you want to walk on water…you have to get out of the boat… walking on water and enjoying the beautiful lotus floating atop it today 🪷🪷🪷

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Several years ago a wonderful client of mine moved to Albuquerque. She graciously had me out to do some decorating there and visit for a week. During our visit she and her husband took me to Sedona. Truly a bucket list trip. Scenic does not begin to describe the majestic beauty of that landscape! No words can even begin to describe what I saw and felt there. Otherworldly comes to mind. As I sat on those outcropping of rocks I removed my shoes. It felt like holy ground. Never before had I beheld such a rugged ethereal place. After Sedona, she and I went to Santa Fe. What a treat to go to the Georgia O’Keefe museum there. As they were setting up for an exhibit, we were allowed to go to a part that few ever get to visit. Her sketch books, artist brushes and value studies. As an artist, I have always been enthralled with her work and its detail. To say I was excited to view her personal tools of the trade is an understatement. I did not get the chance to visit Ghost Ranch, but that will hopefully be another trip. One thing in particular struck me in her thoughts was, “take time to look…”. Along with all the stones I had picked up there, I purchased a rock with that saying on it.

This morning, as I opened the draperies in my room, I was struck with the most incredible sunrise. Having just broken the horizon there was an enormous red ball of breathtaking sun. I thought of that rock that sits on some antique books in the living room, along side of the kaleidoscope I bought in Santa Fe. Take time to look…. I sat back in bed for a half hour just looking.. the sun, its rays and the incredibly cool breeze that was blowing in. Yes, a God moment. Grateful does not come even close to what I was feeling. Sometimes words definitely fail me.

How much of God’s creation and beauty do we miss daily because we do not stop and “take time to look…” . Today, take that minute, be aware of all that is around us that truly is majestic miraculous beauty. It’s there. Choose happy today. Much love and joy coming your way ❤️!!

Ruach is the Hebrew word for “breath of God“. Genesis 1 says, “the earth was without form and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters.” His Spirit is translated from “Ruach” His breath or wind was over the waters .

Recent months the stirring restlessness that was in me, to push me out of my comfort zone, was calmed this week. I sincerely have sought God’s breath of life…Ruach…and there was a crack in my resistance. Nothing like the possibility of cancer returning to grab your attention. Ok, ok I’m listening…..

Meeting with 2 prayer healers, being still before the Lord, gave clear insight to a closing door . As of yesterday, I am once again 100% self employed.

I had a printed paper sign on my fridge for the last several years, “if you aren’t scared your dream isn’t big enough”. I shared with the friend who asked this morning, “How’s day 2 going?” I remembered that paper and replied that possibly for the first time ever, I am happy with my life and tracking…. Having been so busy with everyone and everything else I’m not sure I ever really had a dream (except a porch swing) and one is now in place. (I don’t know can you manifest a porch swing? guess I’d need the porch first🧐).

Today I gave myself permission to rest. A podcast or 2 and getting a bit organized. The gray rainy day with windows and doors open letting in its gentle sound has been perfect. Being present is always difficult but today I am doing it. Being. Listening. Hearing. No regrets of yesterday or fretting over tomorrow but here solely.

Drastic change is coming and I will embrace the opportunities that ensue. Today I am still.

If there are places in your heart you are feeling a restless nudge…pay attention…it just might be a change is needed. Open to it prayerfully and then be still and listen! It took a health reminder to get me to stop and pay attention. The “all clear “ was me getting a second chance to get up and change things.

Life’s journey is so short. If change is needed do it now while there is still time. He’s got you always.

I believe a nap is in order 😉. 🪷🪷🪷

I see you in this clear days sparkling sun across the waters

In the gentle clouds floating effortlessly across cerulean skies

The swaying trees as your quieting breeze passes through

The way my curtains billow into the room as the springs soft wind comes through my doors

The glint on the perfectly formed spider web on my porch

You are speaking…

Always my gentle cooing doves..perhaps the sweetest of all

The way the scent of mid spring honeysuckle brings such delight to my senses

A field of yellow flowers on my back roads shortcut

Verdant greens of the lawn from my deck view

Mom and dad goose paddling by with their little brood between them

You are speaking….

Long shadows cast from my deck rails

Cicadas humming

Seagulls diving for fish out on the river

The train rumbling in the distance reminding me of my childhood home

The waterfall babbling over the stones into the koi pond

Yes, You are speaking ….

I’m reading a book by Mark Batterson, “Whispers..how to hear the voice of God“. He talks about those who say miracles do not happen any longer….the fact that today I could see, hear, smell and sense all these things are beyond a doubt miracles all around me. Every book I’ve read of his is divinely sent.

I am listening….

Life’s journey is certainly messy at times. I await the call to see what my biopsies show this time. Either way, I was present today and observed just a small part of the miraculous beauty surrounding me. I breathed in Spring’s rebirth and it was magnificent. Stop a minute and feel all your senses this Spring. Til next time…namaste 🪷🪷🪷